There are not many things that I know better than SwanQueen. I was not a forever fan – I actually distinctly remember seeing an interview with Lana Parrilla a few years ago in Latina Magazine and not thinking much of it, except for the fact that she was a very beautiful woman and a Latina as a lead in a TV show and that made me very happy. The article was about Once Upon a Time and I didn’t really pay mind to the show because at that time I was in college, working two jobs, taking crazy amounts of credits and just overall too busy to be watching TV. I am totally and completely thankful to my fiancé who at random picked Once Upon a Time as our binge watch last summer on Netflix. We were in the process of binge watching shows because I was unemployed and she was not in school for the summer. My coincidental following of the show soon became an obsession with the two leads, Regina Mills and Emma Swan, and the magnetism that I saw between them.

When I first heard of the show I was not out; far from it actually. I hadn’t really come to terms with the whole sexuality thing. I was barely even at the precipice of discovering who I am. Now, five years later, proudly, as a full-fledged, self-identified lesbian and feminist, I have to just ask the question we are all thinking with this season finale – Why is SwanQueen NOT canon? I mean my fiancé and I held hands when Regina wished to go wherever Emma was and then traveled through the forest shouting her name. Seriously? I mean my heart ached for them. I have read many articles about the writers of this show and how they don’t write toward specific relationships, but this series has been a never-ending succession of repeated opportunities and set ups for a SwanQueen romance. I cannot describe my devastation that Robin Hood came back at the end of the episode — WHY?!

Robin has passed and in case people haven’t noticed Regina is alive and well and kicking serious ass in every episode. If she is not weakening the power of the Evil Queen through pure magical badassery she is the most emotionally open and raw that we have ever seen her. She has been such a boss lady in so many impossible situations this season and she has been woefully underrated. FINALLY in the finale episode we see Regina and Emma back together. Their banter is on point and their connection is undeniable. We have been subjected to erroneous and unnecessary distancing of these characters throughout the season and it was truly a transformative experience seeing them work together in these last two episodes. To rely on one another – to connect in the most basic of ways as they did in the earliest of episodes. This is the SwanQueen that we all know and love. So I ask again – WHY ARE THEY NOT CANON?

Of all the wishes that Regina could have wished in that moment; bringing back Robin (which didn’t even seem to cross her mind), or anything she could have ever wanted she wished to be wherever Emma Swan was. She put herself in harm’s way for Emma. She pretended to be Evil again for Emma. She would literally do anything for her. I just kept shouting KISS HER at the television. I mean I am going to admit that I have been reading a particularly large amount of SwanQueen fanfiction in the past two weeks, but it is so much greater than that. Let us not even begin to talk about how Emma stayed in wish land with Regina despite her desire to return to Henry and her parents. These two are simply meant to be.

I turned to the love of my life and said this is exactly why I want to write Lesbian/ Women Loving Women novels. There is barely any representation for us. These characters could easily and pretty much effortlessly transition into a romantic relationship but that will never happen. When the writers say they do not think about relationships or ‘shipping’ when they write that is completely false. Mainstream media would not allow for the two female leads (which come on we have two female leads on a TV show – what more could we want?) to also be in love with one another. That would not happen. Let us all take a collective sigh – because clearly this battle we have been fighting as a Swen/SwanQueen shippers is dismantling with every new season.

I sat watching in suspense – my heart is still craving SwanQueen and was completely disappointed by the reappearance of Robin. We know what is to come. Robin from this pretend wish land that Emma was in will not be the same Robin that Regina knew and loved. He will disappoint her. He will hurt her in some way – and I believe he will leave just as quickly as he reappeared. Regina has grown. She has changed. Every season – every freaking episode rather – Regina is a representation of the sheer force and power of a determined woman. She knows what she wants and she goes for it without hesitation. She is the Queen we all knew she could always be and what she has consistently and unwaveringly fought for is the safety of one, Emma Swan, and her family.

SwanQueen is endgame. It always will be. The writers should really just get with the picture already.